My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I wish I only lived at night.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
