Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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