I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
