I understand Curling. That high.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
