I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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