Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
BRING THE BAGELS
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Randomize
