Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
