but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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