they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
