Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I want her autograph on my taint
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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