make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
