I cockslap morals
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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