He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
