i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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