Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
