I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
