Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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