who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He felt like a one man threesome
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
We just shotgunned beers for America
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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