Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
i came on her dog
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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