You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
