she was so not down for the gang bang
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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