well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
