im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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