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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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