The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize