is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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