4 words: hood of his car
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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