my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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