thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
