It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
