dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
it's like iHOP with fire
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
