just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
