There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize
