hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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