Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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