my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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