i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
