let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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