Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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