That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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