If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
