I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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