hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
