And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
