Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
