I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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