This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
