We're facebook friends in real life
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
