there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
