she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
