i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
