she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize